Sunday, November 30, 2008

Starting to pack and plan my escape from Surprize!

Day 124 and I survived my ass falling off on Thanksgiving by picking it up, dusting it off, putting it in a paper bag and taking it to an NA meeting then going to McCormick and Schmick's with my sponsor for two "single guy Thanksgiving specials" and washed it down with a big glass of milk and all was well with my world as I know it once again. Then I spent yesterday afternoon meeting with some fellow members of my new 501(c)(3) non-profit expressive art therapy project down on Roosevelt Row looking at buildings and coming up with a target area of where we want to be located. Then in the late afternoon I met up for coffee with a gal pal of mine who wound up going with me to my weekly alumni group meeting out at The Sundance Center. Afterwards we went out for matching his and her crocks of French onion soup at Mimi's Cafe the out to the El Chorro Lodge for coffee and a little slow dancing on the patio under the stars which was quite a nice way to spend Black Friday.

I must admit that it was nice to have a beautiful woman in my arms again and slow dancing to all the standard "Rat Pack" tunes but walking her to her door and kissing her lightly on her cheek and locking her within the safe confines of her condo for the night was totally a new experience for this old horndog currenltly celibate by choice. This whole "celibacy deal" that I've been struggling with on a daily basis and going out on platonic dates with drop dead gorgeous women is a bit akin to me locking myself in a Motel 6 with a quarter ounce of meth, an eightball of crack , two fifths of Crown Royal and attempting to work on my 4th step and reading the Big Book without touhing any of it but I had a wonderful evening and I was able to wake up and look at myself in the mirror this morning so that is a good thing....I guess....LOL

So now I have a ton on my plate with getting the non-profit set up asap so I can hopefully get out and beat the streets for endowments, grants and donations to get it funded, lease a building and start hiring staff before the end of the year now just a scant 30 days away all at the same time I'm looking for a new personal residence, pack and move as close to the center of Phoenix as possible on or before December 15th when my lease out here on the edge of civilization expires and my rent shoots up from $725 to $1,100 because all the "snowbirds" come out from the ice pack states like the swallows annual return to Capistrano. No great loss there as I hate the cultural, architectural, political and just about every other type of vacuum that exists out here but I'm sitting here with a mere c-note left in my jeans, one carton of smokes, two months upside down on car payments (but it is now insured!) and just enough gas for my daily trips back and forth to my po box to look for the check that's been "in the mail" to me from my one and only social media marketing client that's been on it's way now for oh, about 9 weeks now and trying not to panic and starting to park my car in different places at night to hide it from the repo man who's already starting to call my brother up in Sonoma County looking for me as he's listed as my next of kin on my car loan application. My next address just might be my license plate number if you catch my drift but I ain't sweating just quite yet. That in itself is a tad bit worrysome however I'll discuss that with my therapist on Tuesday right before I hand her that last c-note and go pawn my watch.

It's "rough out here I tell ya!" but what else can I do? Going backwards is not even an option so I have to keep rowing this boat forward even though it continues to be sinking faster than it's moving ahead but that's what it's all about I'm coming to realize. There is no deserted island paradise to row to with my Bukowski book and Miles Davis CD populated with brown skinned, post-pubescent, nymphomanics in heat. There's just this endless rowing.

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